Mandi's Stargate: SG-1
Sound Page

Ah, yes, the sound page, my first meager attempt at a new and inventive SG-1 fan page. Way back in 1998, this was an original idea. Now... well, the sounds are still here for your entertainment. Sadly, I can't make sound clips at the moment. Sorry for any poor sound quality, most of these clips were made in 1998 and 1999.


Emancipation

Unknown: That one is a woman.
O'Neill: Observant bunch.
observant.wav, 118 KB

Carter: Daniel--find me an anthropologist that dresses like this and I will eat this headdress.
headdress.wav, 103 KB

Carter: I'm a lousy cook and I couldn't spin, weave or dye if my life depended on it. You made yourself a bad deal.
lousycook.wav, 123 KB

Jackson: How is it that you always come up with the worst case scenario?
O'Neill: I practice.
practice.wav, 100 KB

Teal'c: But what will happen to Dr. Carter tonight if we wait?
Apu's father: Telgan will partake in his newest purchase.
O'Neill: Ohhh, there's not a chance in hell.
partake.wav, 203 KB

Carter: I've never been so happy to see you guys.
O'Neill: Oh sure you have. Remember that time on P3X-595? You drank that stuff, that made you take off--
Carter: Ahem. We won't get into that right now.
happytoseeyou.wav, 254 KB

O'Neill: Damn! Guess I'm going to have to cancel that Oprah interview.
Teal'c: What is an Oprah?
oprah.wav, 126 KB

Broca Divide

O'Neill: Lucy, I'm hooome!
Teal'c: I am not Lucy.
O'Neill: I know that. It's a reference to an old TV-- Never mind. Open the door.
Teal'c: I will summon the doctor.
O'Neill: No, come on. I'm fine. I'm back to being myself. Just open up.
Teal'c: I cannot be certain you are back to being yourself. You referred to me as "Lucy."
O'Neill: Oh, for crying out loud, will you just open the door??
lucyhome.wav, 470 KB

First Commandment

Baker: There's hundreds, maybe thousands of them. He's their god.
They'll die for him, they'll kill for him, in a heartbeat.
theirgod.wav, 124 KB

Baker: No, sir.
O'Neill: "No, sir?" Does it say Colonel anywhere on my uniform?
nosir.wav, 113 KB

O'Neill: We're off to see the wizard.
wizard.wav, 31 KB

Jackson: This tastes like chicken.
Carter: So what's wrong with that?
Jackson: It's macaroni and cheese.
chicken.wav, 83 K

Baker: Kill me.
O'Neill: You sure? I've come all this way.
killme.wav, 84 K

The Nox

O'Neill: No, you can't keep him.
keephim.wav, 54.2 KB

Jackson: I thought we were dead. Weren't we dead?
Carter: Yeah...
Jackson: Okay. Well, I thought Heaven would be a little more upscale.
upscale.wav, 166 KB

Cold Lazarus

O'Neill: Come on, get me out of here. Tell you what - let me put it nicely! Get me the hell out of here!!
Hammond: If that isn't O'Neill, I want to know who the hell we're looking at.
notoneill.wav, 304 KB

Hammond: Teal'c, you'll have to leave that here.
Teal'c: I have seen your world. I will need it.
needit.wav, 70 K

Thor's Hammer

Teal'c: You should not have attempted to rescue me from the beam.
If you had not done so, you would not be here now.
O'Neill: Ahh, you'd have done the same for me. Course, you're not going to find me
walking around with one of those goa'uld larvae in my gut, but hey.
same4me.wav, 330 KB

Kendra: Because of my training in the temple, the goa'uld who took possession of my body could not take complete control over my mind. A part of me, myself, remained.
Jackson: Something of the host survives.
partofme.wav, 331 K

Teal'c: You....do not....exist.
notexist.wav, 88 KB

Unas: Kill the human.
O'Neill: Excuse me?
excuseme.wav, 78 KB, 3.59 sec.

Jackson: My wife, Sha're, is now as you once were. She has been taken by a goa'uld, and if what you are saying is true...
Kendra: It is true.
Jackson: Then help us.
helpus.wav, 279 KB

Cor-Ai

O'Neill: Daniel, it's important that we respect our elders.
elders.wav, 86 KB

Jackson: Well, it's just that I've never actually heard you referred to as a diplomat. I think antagonist was the word used.
antagonist.wav, 126 KB

Teal'c: It is one of their favorite places to harvest hosts for Goa'uld absorption.
Jackson: You know, I wish you wouldn't say 'harvest.' We're talking about human beings, not brussels sprouts.
brussels_sprouts.wav, 168 KB

O'Neill: I have spent a lot of years in the service of my country. And I have been ordered to do some damned distasteful things. I will not let them execute my friend.
distastefulthings.wav, 263 KB

Hanno: You would save those who wish to kill you?
Teal'c: I would save those who deserve to live.
deservetolive.wav, 113 KB

Hanno: You are not the same man as he who murdered my father.
Teal'c: I am the one.
Hanno: No. That Jaffa is dead. You have killed him.
killedhim.wav, 189 KB

Enigma

Carter: Air...seems to be in pockets ranging from 1500 degrees down to 200.
O'Neill: Sounds like L.A.
soundslikela.wav, 127 KB

Narim: You are anything but primitive, Samantha. What your mind doesn't know, your heart fills in.
Carter: I don't know what that means exactly, but it's beautiful.
Narim: Which is exactly what it means.
anythingbutprimitive.wav, 295 KB

O'Neill: Whoa. Cool.
whoacool.wav, 43 KB

O'Neill: God, I love those people.
lovethosepeople.wav, 48 KB

Jackson: What? Oh...just thinking about what the little guy with funny hair once told us.
O'Neill: 'The very young do not always do as they're told.'
Jackson: Yeah.
theveryyoung.wav, 263 KB

There But For the Grace of God

O'Neill: Good morning, campers!
campers.wav, 90 KB

Katherine: I take it they're not engaged in your reality?
Jackson: (beat) No.
notengaged.wav, 102 KB

Jackson: Uh-oh.
Carter: What?
Jackson: I think I'm dead.
danieldead.wav, 129 KB

Within the Serpent's Grasp

O'Neill: What'd you call it?
Teal'c: Zat'nicatel.
O'Neill: Right. Let's just call it a zat gun, huh?
zatgun.wav, 140 KB

O'Neill: I always get a happy tingly feeling when I see those guys.
happytinglyfeeling.wav, 82 KB

Teal'c: Somewhat like your television, only much further advanced.
O'Neill: Think it gets Showtime?
showtime.wav, 134 KB

O'Neill: Okay. One shot hurts them, two shots kills them. The third shot--
Teal'c: Disintegrates them.
O'Neill: Oh. Great. You didn't think this was worthy of mentioning.
oneshot.wav, 192 KB

Carter: Sir, the only way to do that would be to turn this thing around and go back to where we started.
Jackson: Right, I'll just go tell the pilot.
pilot.wav, 114 KB

In the Line of Duty

O'Neill: They might have been a little concerned because we just kicked the crap out of Apophis.
kickedthecrap.wav, 91 KB

Teal'c: I have seen many Goa'uld strategies revealed, and certain victories lost because of Goa'uld arrogance. It is the Goa'ulds' greatest weakness.
greatestweakness.wav, 193 KB, 9 sec.

Jolinar: You are weak.
O'Neill: Who's behind bars right now?
behindbars.wav, 55 KB

Jolinar: They would not have killed me. I am too valuable.
O'Neill: Which is exactly why we'll never let you go.
valuable.wav, 146 KB

Teal'c: Every Goa'uld seeks power for his own reasons, or betrays his own brother to achieve it.
Jolinar: Some seek power for a greater purpose.
greaterpurpose.wav, 150 KB

Jolinar: Not every Goa'uld is an enemy to the people of this planet.
The Tok'ra are real, no matter what Apophis has told you.
Teal'c: I have yet to meet one.
Jolinar: You have now. I am Jolinar of Malk'shur.
jolinar.wav, 268 KB

O'Neill: Can you be sure he is who he says he is?
Teal'c: No.
Jolinar: Unfortunately, we do not carry identification.
identif.wav, 144 KB

Jolinar: Hear this. The days of the Goa'uld System Lords are numbered. Tell them that I died with hope. My death only feeds the fire that burns strong in the Tok'ra.
feedfire.wav, 226 KB

Teal'c: Are you injured?
Jackson: Dumb question. But thank you. I think.
Teal'c: You are welcome.
Jackson: Just don't ever do that again.
injure.wav, 245 KB

Carter: The Goa'uld gave its life for me. It saved me.
savedme.wav, 103 KB

Bane

O'Neill: Witness if you will, a ghost town.
ghosttown.wav, 75 KB

Hammond: What is that?
O'Neill: Those are bugs, sir! Big, ugly bugs!
uglybugs.wav, 120 KB

Carter: All I'm saying is that notwithstanding what happened to Teal'c, there might be invaluable technology on that planet.
O'Neill: Carter, there are bugs on that planet. Big, huge, ugly, honkin' bugs.
honkinbugs.wav, 213 KB

Carter: If we do find Teal'c soon, we might have a way of saving him.
O'Neill: Okay. That's good news.
Carter: But...someone has to go back to VP63Q1 and catch one of those alien insects. Preferably alive.
Jackson: And that would be the bad news.
badnews.wav, 282 KB

Punk: I'll remove myself when you tell me how they do tattoos like that in Chulak.
Teal'c: The skin is cut with an orac knife, and pure molten gold is poured into the wound.
Punk: Ow, man, don't that hurt when you do that?
Teal'c: Tremendously.
tattoo.wav, 345 KB

O'Neill: Pack your bug spray, kids.
bugspray.wav, 38 KB

Harlow: Not your garden-variety mosquito.
mosquito.wav, 54 KB

Teal'c: What type of weapon do you possess?
Ally: This? I'll show you, it's just a water gun. I was playing, see?
(squirts him, causes Teal'c to make a startled sound)
watergun.wav, 177 KB

Ally: If you ask me, you look like you could use a couple more days in rehab.
rehab.wav, 83 KB

O'Neill: He saved your smarmy ass and everyone else on this planet! Does that count for anything in your world?
Maybourne: Absolutely. And I am thrilled to get the chance to thank him personally.
O'Neill: General Hammond, request permission to beat the crap out of this man.
beatthecrap.wav, 344 KB

Ally: Don't sweat it.
Teal'c: I cannot prevent it.
Ally: I meant, okay.
sweatit.wav, 129 KB

Maybourne: Striking an officer is a quick way to a court-martial.
O'Neill: I'm not going to hit you, Maybourne. I'm going to shoot you.
shootyou.wav, 204 KB

Ally: I ain't seen nobody, and even if I did, I wouldn't tell you.
Maybourne: Why's that?
Ally: Because...I don't like the way you smell.
wayyousmell.wav, 188 KB

Jackson: Guess we shouldn't have loaded it, huh?
Teal'c: How else would she defend herself?
(He takes out own water gun and squirts Daniel before running off.)
Jackson: How else?
howelse.wav, 328 KB

The Fifth Race

O'Neill: Teal'c looked, I looked, it grabbed my head, I passed out, I came to, we're here, we're home ...Can we go?
canwego.wav, 171 KB

Jackson: You just said there's nothing cruvas with you.
O'Neill: I did not.
Jackson:Yes you did.
O'Neill: No I didn't.
Jackson: Yes you did.
O'Neill: Didn't.
Jackson: Did.
O'Neill: Didn't.
Jackson: Did.
O'Neill: Cruvas? What is that?
Jackson: I don't know.
cruvas.wav, 321 KB

Teal'c: What is the reason for these padded gloves, O'Neill?
O'Neill: So we don't hurt each other. ...I'll be honest with you, Teal'c: it's so you don't hurt me.
gloves.wav, 178 KB

Jackson: Well, my translation's a bit vague. I think the circle means "the place of our legacy." Um, or it could be "a piece of our leg," but the first seems to make more sense.
legacy.wav, 277 KB

1969

Carter: This time of year, the direct line between P2X55 and the Earth takes us within 70,000 miles of the sun. I have to update the computer's drift calculation to include gravitational space-time warping.
O'Neill: We know that!
knowthat.wav, 265 KB

O'Neill: How'd you know that would work?
Teal'c: I did not.
work.wav, 83 KB

O'Neill: Little bump in the calculations, Captain?
Carter: I'm sorry, sir. I don't know what to say.
O'Neill: Well, I'll tell you what: get us back home and we'll say it never happened.
bump.wav, 185 KB

Carter: We also cannot tell anyone who we are or where we're from.
O'Neill: This is a top secret facility. Anonymity does not go over big here.
anonymity.wav, 248 KB

O'Neill: Captain James T. Kirk, of the Starship Enterprise.
Thornton: Your dog tags say otherwise.
O'Neill: They're lying.
lying.wav, 222 KB

Thornton: Our cameras saw some sort of weapon.
O'Neill: Oh. Well, it's hard to say.
Thornton: Some sort of state secret?
O'Neill: No, just difficult to pronounce.
hard2say.wav, 220 KB

O'Neill: I'll be honest with you, Bob. My name's not Kirk. It's Skywalker. Luke Skywalker.
skywalk.wav, 190 KB

Officer: What are we going to do about SG-1?
Gen. Hammond: They're out there somewhere. Hopefully, they'll find their way back.
Officer: Shouldn't we start a search?
Gen. Hammond: I'm afraid this is one mission they're on their own.
ontheirown.wav, 283 KB

O'Neill: Listen. I don't know where we're headed, but they'll probably try to split us up. So we're not going to have much time to--
Carter: -escape and hopefully live out the rest of our lives without affecting history.
O'Neill: Or...
Carter: I can't think of an "or" at the moment, sir.
Jackson: No "or?"
O'Neill: There is an "or."
Jackson: There's an "or?"
Carter: Sir, you can't just will something to happen because you want it to be a certain way.
O'Neill: Captain ... where there's a will, there's an "or!"
willor.wav, 491 KB

Lt. Hammond: How did you know?
O'Neill: Because we know you. Because we will know you. And for some reason, thirty years ago, you decided we were gonna need help. Otherwise, you wouldn't be standing there with a note. Now are you gonna listen to yourself?
knowyou.wav, 395 KB

O'Neill: You know, the 'Vette blew it when they went with that body style. They used to be so cool.
Jackson: Actually, I was about four and a half years old in '69.
in69.wav, 491 KB

Carter: In order to preserve our past, Katherine has to meet you years from now.
Jackson: So we go in disguise. Pretend to be ... foreigners.
O'Neill: How are you gonna do that?
Jackson: Well, I speak 23 different languages. Pick one.
foreign.wav, 273 KB

Girl: So what'd you do?
Jackson: We didn't, uh, we didn't do anything.
O'Neill: We've got a little problem with ... the establishment.
Girl: I so relate to that.
Carter: So if you could take us as far as New York, we'd--
Girl: I really love your hair.
Carter: Thanks.
estab.wav, 409 KB

Michael: Your thing ... uh, that thing ... what's it symbolize? Peace?
Teal'c: Slavery. To false gods.
Michael: Right on!
slavery.wav, 223 KB

Girl: You said ... that you were in trouble with the establishment.
O'Neill: And ... we are.
Jackson: We are.
O'Neill: Just not the establishment of this planet. No, it's true, Michael. We came to Earth to hide among your people, a long, long time ago.
Jackson: From a galaxy far, far away.
O'Neill: But now it's time to go home, and we need your help.
planet.wav, 653 KB

O'Neill: Listen, I really have to say this. The two of you have been unbelievably...
Jackson: Groovy.
O'Neill: Groovy, I think, is the word.
groovy.wav, 243 KB

O'Neill: Auntie Em! Auntie Em!
auntieem.wav, 73 KB

Cassandra: I will tell you this: your journey is just beginning.
journey.wav, 115 KB

Gen. Hammond: Oh, by the way, Colonel ... with interest, you owe me five hundred thirty-nine dollars and fifty cents.
O'Neill: Yes, sir.
interest.wav, 182 KB


Back to the main SG-1 page
Back to the Weird Web Page!